"A Successful Match" manual

"Do's & Don'ts"
HERE IS A GREAT ANALOGY TO REMEMBER ABOUT THIS PART OF THE PROCESS:
Imagine the following situation in a car: You're in the backseat, the birth mother is the driver and American Adoptions is the guide providing the directions. The birth mother has all the control. She can choose to follow the directions provided by AA or not follow them. You, the adoptive family, are along for the ride. You may have a different route in mind but you don't have control over where she takes you. It is best to sit back, relax, and go along for the ride. While every ride doesn't end up at the planned destination, one of these drives will take you to your final destination, a new baby."
DO: be patient, relinquish control, keep a normal routine, be flexible, trust your gut, enjoy your
experience, educate yourself, keep promises, and prepare for changes.
DON'T: Expect things set in stone, quit your job, tell everyone you know about the match, rely
on outside advice, focus on all the details, get ahead of yourself, be paranoid or jump to
conclusions, or sell your sports car for a minivan.

This is the opening page of our latest manual that we received in the mail. Haven't gotten to read past this page yet, but not really liking where this is going. Although we already understand all this part. Relinquishing control is a tough thing. Giving the birth mother all the control...it's tough, but necessary for a successful match. I'm so glad that we have God to rely on with all of this. I don't have a problem relinquish control to Him. I know He has our best interest at heart and that He loves us more than anyone can. We'll just trust Him.

A packet from our agency

Today we received another packet from our agency. It has a sheet that tells all about our social worker, Kelli, our printed out profile (we like the online one-MUCH better) and another little booklet entitled "Preparing for a Successful Match". We'll see what it has to say! Fun stuff! =)

Ramblings

Target has some really neat baby stuff. I walked the aisles and checked some stuff out today. They had a snugride and stroller on clearance. I didn't bite...even though I wanted to. The item was exactly what I liked, but the colors were all wrong. I've been spending free afternoons running around Lawrence, checking out any store that has baby stuff. I stood in the baby bottle aisle for 45 minutes the other day...just looking...reading the back of each bottle box. Do you know how many different styles of bottles there are? A lot! =) The Target had a lot more stuff than Walmart had. Some things I find are completely unnecessary and I don't care about them at all but some things I want anyway. We'll see. I bought a few things online and so in a few days when the last of those items come, I will get to wash them and get them all ready to go...for whenever! I just really needed to do something! I'm having some real fun with it. I wasn't going to do any of this. I didn't even have the desire to do any of this before the paperwork was finished, but now, everything is different. I read the forums on our adoption agency website and realize that each case is different. A few families have been waiting for 16-20 monthes and haven't gotten even one call from someone interested. Then there are other families who haven't been waiting very long, but also, there is one family who went active and came home with their baby in exactly ONE MONTH. This just makes me realize even more that this is totally in God's hands. So right now in this moment, I can be patient and just try to enjoy this moment...that is subject to change at any time. You would think I have the hormones of a pregnant lady, I'm happy, I'm laughing, I'm crying...you never know what emotion I'm about to exhibit. For the most part, people are really understanding of this. Good thing, I'd hate to lose all my friends because I've aparently lost my mind.

New "waiting" counter ------->

I've added a new counter to my blog. It's a waiting counter...it may be encouraging or discouraging but I thought it would be fun. =)

online profile link

http://www.americanadoptions.com/family_profile/index/fp_id/9651

We're live on the internet!

Received the email today from our social worker that we are live on the internet. What this means is that anyone can view our profile from anywhere...especially birth mothers...but also you, if you want to!

We're ACTIVE!!!!!!!!!!

We got word from our agency this morning that we are active on the internet. Wade sent us the final paper work to sign (a 21 page contract that required initialing each section; signing and being notarized). So now our profile is out there for anyone and everyone to see. The contract said that it is also attached to a network of Adoption Attorney's list, pregnancy crisis center lists, other Adoption Agencies list, ect. So now the true waiting begins! We have done all we can, now we just wait for a birth Mom to choose us! We aren't supposed to pester the Adoption Agency but once a month to see if they have heard anything. The birth Mother's Social Worker will contact us when one has chosen us. My phone is charged up and the voicemail/answering machine has been checked! Please continue to pray for us and for the birth Mom God has for us!

Oops!

We got an email from the graphic designer at our adoption agency today asking if we needed any additional help with our profile changes. Apparently, she didn't get the changes/updates that we sent THREE WEEKS AGO! We've been sitting here debating if we were going to email them asking about the status of our profile finalization. It's some my fault and some theirs. I sent the profile changes, NOT to the graphic designer, but to the adoption coordinator and to our social worker. I told them that the changes were attached to the email and that we were also sending the activation fee. The adoption coordinator told me as soon as the profile changes were approved and the profile was ready for publishing, he would send us a contract to sign and notarize. We've been waiting for the contract when the graphic designer hasn't even received the changes. I'm so thankful that she contacted us today. She emailed me back, apologized, and said if I resend her the changes that she could make the changes and send us the final copy. After we approved that, she can get it put up on the internet profile site by this weekend. So hopefully, our profile will be on the internet this weekend and maybe the other profile will be available by Monday. How discouraging to realize that miscommunication caused this! Several times over the last few weeks I've thought about email them and asking how it was going and if they needed anything else from us. We don't want to seem too anxious, or pushy, but now I wish I had been. They told us once we are active that we can check with them no more than once a month. If we have interest in our profile, a social worker will be in touch with us. We don't want to seem impatient and be a pain in the butt. We are going to need a little extra prayer, I think!